I must be one berry short of a fruit and nut bowl, seriously. 2 marcs. 2 marcs! And he had me reconsidering everything I had decided within myself was certain. I still think he is a little crazy, and that he makes me crazy right along with him. He carries me away in the wake of his enthusiasm, a trait I am severly lacking in of late. He made my blood course though, filled my veins with the hint of promise, though tempered with a healthy dose of trepidation.

My mind spins on the decision even now. Shadows of a past I have no wish to relive haunt my conscience, warring within me for precedence over the fleeting sense of possibilities. Without him there to stir my failing conviction, I fear that the echoes hold sway, stamping out all flickers of promise with a boot made of fear and a hurt I truly thought I no longer carried. I cannot go through that again, I know for sure I would not survive it a second time over.

Which is why it cannot be me and must be him. Perhaps it will be nothing. More likely than not it will be nothing and I will have held onto this twisting in my gut for no reason. But maybe it will be something. Maybe we will drown in it, but maybe, just..maybe, we will soar.